Tuesday, September 26, 2006

school life

A small boy, in tears, explained to his teacher that he’d trapped his manhood in his zip. The teacher asked whether it was cut or bleeding and whether the child would like to have his Mother called to come and check. No, he explained, it was ok but what he would really like was a plaster. The teacher said that she didn’t feel that a plaster would help matters and that he should perhaps sit down and try and take his mind off his troubles by doing a really hard sum.
Some time later the child approached his teacher again, this time wreathed in smiles.
Boy - “I’m fine now”
Teacher - “I’m so pleased has it stopped hurting?”
Boy - “No but I have a plaster on it now”
Teacher - “Oh really? Where did you get it?”
Boy - “I took it off my verruca”

13 comments:

Cherrypie said...

Necessity is the master of invention. Aren't verruccas contagious?

Zig said...

O yes! It doesn't bare thinking about too much, boys eh? Who have em?

Frontier Editor said...

Hail the chancreing hero, I always say.

Zig said...

FE you and CP showed start your own comedy duo - there's work for you out there!

TFIF!

Zig said...

'should' not 'showed' - where did that come from??

thofu - something vegetarian past it's sell by date

Frontier Editor said...

question: which one of us is Cook and which is Moore?

Zig said...

How many legs do you have?

Frontier Editor said...

Just two, unless you echo everyone else's claim that I don't have a leg to stand on

Zig said...

my all time favourite Pete and Dud sketch is the actor with just the one leg, applying for a part. It had the classic line
"I have nothing against your right leg, unfortunately neither do you"

Frontier Editor said...

Excuse me while I grin off my expansive posterior >B^D>

Unknown said...

I'm afraid I don't know what a 'plaster' is..... is it a bandage? Or did I just prove my stupidity even more by saying that?

Frontier Editor said...

Very good Pam - it took three years of my childhood to get it, not to mention all those awful school lunch desserts. Did you know that, when I was in first grade in England, our school actually made us eat lemon jello with chocolate topping? THAT's what I had to go through to learn what a plaster was >B^D>

I'm sure that Ziggi's school is much more enlightened ;^D

Zig said...

A plaster is a bandaid - is that what you call them? Every child over 3 wants one for the most minor of injuries, that and an ice pack!
I don't know what first grade is! How old is that? And no, we're not allowed to serve anything with chocolate in (or on) - unhealthy! We have the nanny state here which legislates what children can eat at school and jelly and chocolate are definitely off the menu now :o)