anyone for golf...? (should this be ..? using the dot of the ? to form the 3 ellipsis?)

I only have the smallest of lawns, if indeed lawn can be used to describe a twelve foot square, even when it had grass. Now it is mainly dirt, to call it soil would be to show it more respect than it deserves.  Before this sudden and unexpected dry spell I had mud. Mud of varying depths where small industrious dogs have applied their version of gardening which as far as I can tell involves digging an assortment of holes of various sizes with great enthusiasm and astonishing speed.  This has caused the grass of which there was once a fair covering to vanish as though it never was, although it grows aplenty between the flag stones where it isn't required.

Anyhow, what to do? What to do, with this small and arid wastelend? It needs something to keep the dirt / mud from being brought into the house which it is doing in ever increasing volumes.  If these dogs wore trews I would swear they were digging an escape tunnel and had little bags of the stuff up their trouser legs which they were cunningly depositing inside to disguise their nefarious activities. But they don't, so they must just be shovelling it in when I'm not looking and then blaming the cats.

Bailey is the main perpetrator, but he is leading the others astray.  He told me earlier that he is in fact building me a golf course.  He's just roughing it out at the moment.

("Rough! Rough!")

no, I have no idea why they are all 1. ... one of those days

Dear Parcelforce Delivery Person

1. Since when do you deliver before 07.00 AM?! And how dare you put a note through my door saying I wasn’t in when I was in bed like any normal retired person.  It takes more than a nano second to get downstairs you know, you stupid-little-very-early-delivery-person.

1. How dare you say it will be in the post office in the next village but three on your irritating little note and then not deliver it there; BUT while I’m there trying to collect it take it back to my house and put ANOTHER note through my door telling me you tried AGAIN.

1. And then tell me it's now at another Post Office.

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1 ... 5

1. I like these 1 - 5 posts

2. Holiday was wonderful, thanks.

Here we are admiring Gaudi's handywork

3. I think Spring may have lifted its long remembered head and blinked. The forsythia has blossomed and I'm sneezing.

4. I have been officially retired and have a pension!

5. In celebration I should be contemplating a tight perm but my hair has done that by itself, so I'll just have to go for the blue rince*.

*I went for pink instead.

I am sailing, I am sailing . . . but flying first

My daughter, the Baby-Doc, and I are off on our hols tomorrow. I’m so exited I can’t tell you. The other daughter for her sins, is a teacher and doesn’t break up until next Thursday so can’t come. This is a bit of a shame, but as a modern, working woman such as she, has long grown out of holidaying with her mother, and is probably heaving a large, but discreet, sigh of relief at the near miss. But Baby-Doc is a student and is therefore more inclined to grab a free week’s holiday when offered even if it does means putting up with her excruciatingly embarrassing mother.  We have a lot planned for our week sailing around the Med,  although it looks like most of it will be spent changing judging by the two trunks currently blocking the living room. We have enough clothes to last 6 months without repetition, or washing.  The weather doesn’t look that balmy, but at the very least it will be warmer than here and with less snow.  B-D is particularly looking forward to seeing the Gaudi Parc Guell in Barcelona (cue Freddy and Montserrast). And so am I, but what I’m particularly anticipating is the on-board bar, which is free as long as you hand your credit card in at the beginning, doing the Birdie song with complete strangers and also, thinks,  that thing involving a coconut tree and sitting on the floor rowing. I’m sure I’ve seen people enjoying themselves doing such things. We’re also going to hold up the leaning tower while wine tasting the local red, not going into Rome because it’s Good Friday the pope holds no interest, looking at rescued tortoises in Corsica, plus another couple of ports here and there. A kindly soul is moving into chez nous to look after the menagerie and enjoy the Wiltshire weather.  I just have to decide on which shoes, sandals (boots?) to take. See yers laters peeps!

ein kleines nachtlicht

puppy training

1. On thursday evenings I go to puppy training classes with my puppy.  The only thursday it isn’t on is the second thursday in the month.  Nevertheless I went yesterday because I have lost my functioning mind and even though I write these things down I forget that I have and don’t look.
2. Still it’s an interesting drive along narrow country roads without street-lighting but also without traffic. I passed but one vehicle. It is Extremely Dark. That is until the village of Bishop’s Canning where they illuminate their church and the spire suddenly appears on the right (going to puppy training) and it’s horribly eery.
3. It giveth me the heebie-jeebies and I have to drive with eyes left so I can’t see it, so affected by its loominess and malevolence am I.
4. Because there was no puppy training last night (must have been the second thursday in the month), and the village hall was occupied by elderly men with important looking folders all sat in a ring (no idea, you?), I had to about turn and head back home.  The church is not so spooky this way.  In fact isn’t it funny that the same road looks completely different going the other way? This is true of all roads in my experience. I can’t find my way back from somewhere just because I’ve got there.  It looks nothing like the same in reverse. Anyway said church doesn’t bother me so much going home and I don’t get that awful adrenaline rush that catching sight of it engenders going the other way. It is a huge church though, for titchy village and it would put me off living there.  Perhaps they light it like that to keep the inmates inside at night.
5. I don’t have a 5.
6. For the fun of it ...

Extremely Dark (NASA)

Photo taken by Cmdr Hadfield aboard the ISS

You should all follow him on @cmdr_hadfield

incredible photos and an extremely interesting man.